Tuesday, May 22, 2012

My India - A thought aloud

     When I was young, I was taught that India symbolised unity in diversity. The diversity, I completely comprehend. We are diverse, or to put it better, 'divided' by not just language, caste, religion, borders etc., but unsurprisingly by our stand-point on the above too. Take the Mullaiperiyar Dam, or India's vote against Sri Lanka at the UNHCR for example (To name a couple. I dare not bring religion/caste in here!). We are just poles apart in our views. Sometimes, I've even wondered why we have to put up with this diversity which adds layers and layers of complexity to our political system and leads to poor administration, ineffective laws/government/policing and so forth.

     Moving onto to unity: Ever wondered about the few little things that bring India together as a country? I always ask this question to myself. Considering the fact that we are one of the biggest democracies in the world, you would expect me to have ended up with a list that stretches to at least one page, but No! My list barely made it into being called, a list! Until today, I could only think of three things that would make the nation stand as one.
At number 3) Crime and Calamities. This includes murder, rape, child-labour, earthquakes, tsunamis etc., which we come across/read in the newspaper and feel sorry for the affected. I am sure anyone humane enough to be human would feel hurt that they couldn't do anything to stop it. And India as a whole, would definitely feel so.
At number 2) Corruption. Last year's anti-graft campaign opened my eyes to the reality that the Indian Middle Class can stand up for something. Although we did have contradicting views on the 'I am Anna' movement, I think everyone agreed that corruption has to go, one way or the other.
At number 1) What else? It is a feeling of nationalism aroused by either War or Cricket. I don't think I need to say anything about this. You just know!

     Today - I realized there was something else in which we are all similar. Something much bigger that makes us a nation of like-minded people. Like minded in what? In Idolism. (I don't think there is even such a word, but so what?! Let's just add it to our Indian-English Dictionary). Yes, it is another -ism added to the list of -isms we already have. It is unspoken, unrealized, untaught but yet widely followed and liked. We love our Idols. We can’t accept the fact that our 'hero' (or even 'superhero') could ever be wrong or do wrong. Even if we do realize they're wrong, we tend to brush it aside as minor glitches that we can live with. We tend to justify the acts of the 'heroes' we believe in, from movie and cricket stars to political parties. To us, a Rajnikanth or a Sachin Tendulkar can never go wrong. You might think this doesn't really affect the country in any way, but then, Nepotism stems from Idolism and is one of the most serious plagues of our country. We forget that the value of something is never known if it wasn't earned. Legacy is like talent. You need to work with it to be successful. If it is handed in a golden platter, it would definitely falter and that is how we made the monsters who rule us. (Yes, let us accept it. We made them.)

     This attitude was probably handed down to us in our Genes. We were ruled by Kings, we lived in one Dynasty or the other. We never questioned our rulers. Then came the British (who we idolized initially) and later, the freedom movement. Our idols then were Mahatma Gandhi, Subhash Chandra Bose, and many other leaders. If you weren't a Gandhian, you were probably in Netaji's INA. Yes, we did idolize them, but they had character to go with it. 65 years post-independence, we still yearn for heroes to idolise. To my mind, democracy does not work with idolising. The moment we idolise someone, we lose our ability to judge them neutrally. We end up defending their actions (good or bad) and in the process, convincing ourselves. And it doesn’t just stop with that. We create an image around the personality that makes them feel invincible. So, what does this do? It might seem like a minor factor, but it doesn't take long to realise that this outlook of ours in a few years time creates autocracy, thereby destroying democracy.

     It isn't wrong to idolize, but it is always important that perspective goes with it. The fact that a politician is a good public speaker could be a good enough reason to idolise him. But we must always remember to judge him based on his actions and not his words. On a similar note, we also need to understand that a person who excelled in one field need not necessarily excel in another field. Consider our Parliament as an example. We shuffle the parliamentarians across ministries, and more worrisome is the fact that it is now a habit. These are roles that require specialization. We can’t just have a finance minster take over home ministry. That is like asking a cat to bark like a dog. There could always be exceptions to any case, but then, they are only exceptions and not the standards.

     As absurd as it might sound, we can change this. But this change needs to happen from within us. We need to identify the thin line between being faithful and being stubborn and unjust. Its hard, but it cannot be rocket science! After all, it involves introspection and we only need to sculpt 'ourself' into better citizens!

Monday, March 8, 2010

The Story of My Love...

  Sometimes, the celluloid screen has a way of not just touching our hearts but directly bonding to the course our life has taken. 'Vinnaithaandi Varuvaayaa' was one such movie which made me relive my last few years, the joy and anguish; My closest pal often used to comment, "If your love story is ever made into a movie, it would be the greatest flop!". I'll now, leave it for you to decide....



  "Love transcends all boundaries" - A saying I had come across in my childhood; the joyous phase of life when I never realized what love truly meant. A phase when I neither cherished the love I had, nor acknowledged the love that would come my way.. and jolt me out in surprising shock in the near future.

  For me, Life was a fairy tale recited by those who loved me. They made my decisions and like any fairy tale, it turned out to be good for me; and that was the course my life always took.. until he walked in. It was my third year at Engineering when they moved in as our neighbors. My heart slipped a beat each time I met him. Little did I know then that he was the man of my life.

  It took me exactly a year to talk to him. A year wasted.. and then the magic un-spun. We started as friends and moved on to be indispensable to each other. Spent most of our hours on the phone, rest in texts :) The feeling was beyond words can express.. but a feeling I felt obliged to bottle up, for my loved ones. Obviously, when it comes to love, elders always have a reason for refusal, not out of spite, but because they love us too much to trust in our decision. They tend to see the cup as half empty, rather than half full. After-all, Love, unlike fixed-alliances doesn't look for a Jack of All, but a Master of One.

  And so, I was wavering and tentative, on the fence, tormented and torn between a budding relationship and the pillars that stood my life so far. I refrained from accepting him, for, I feared I'd lose all my loved ones.. and it took a year and a half to break this resolute of mine.

  Believe me when I say falling in love is very easy. Deciding to take it forward takes courage. But it takes most to stand up to your dad and say, "Dad, I love him and I want to live the rest of my life with him", when you already know you're up for a thrashing. I can never forget those few years of my life.. when I felt I had no one although there was everyone, when I couldn't cry although my inside was tearing me apart to do so, when I found it difficult to take a breath although I was as free as the birds amidst the trees.

  We dint speak to each other for the next eight months. Those were the days my eyes used to yearn for his sight somewhere on the roads of Bangalore, hoping that he would be at the same place too, just to get a glance. But I never did get to see him. It was a fine morning and I was at my work when he called. His voice was magic to me. But he said, "I'm leaving to UK". I had tears streaming down my cheeks. I said, "Happy Journey".

  Like any other girl, I had to go through what my parents called, "Finding alliance". More tears, bruises, pain, and I couldn't convince my parents. They were too tough. I decided to handle it when the situation comes and agreed to my parents. It was hard to speak to people who thought I was their prospective daughter-in-law. It was harder to stop his thoughts from swarming my mind.

  And then, he called again! Just like that, my anger vanished and I broke into a broad smile that came down from the heart! I almost thought I had forgotten how that would be! I couldn't control my joy on hearing his voice. We spoke like nothing ever happened for real long. And that was how our long kept silence broke!

  We were talking once again. I knew that it would land me in trouble, but I was too happy to think of it yet. Life moved on fine until the day my mom brought me back to reality. I was to get engaged. Left with no other option to call off the engagement, I explained the situation to the guy and he called it off. For me, I had saved my life. However, for my parents, I had sabotaged their plans.

  Two months went by before I could even speak to them. More tears, more pain, calls and letters from his side and no amount of pleading from both of us over a year made my parents even flinch. Mentally down and upset, we were facing far too many road-blocks, rather, dead-ends. He however kept me going all the time. A constant moral support. Another year and a half passed and then he came back to India.

  This time around, my mom took her time, a couple of days to give a thought but eventually said a heart-stabbing "No". I approached my dad who dint differ in response. "I am never going to agree. Go with him, but never ever come back again", was what my dad said before I left them.

  We were married on December 11th 2009 and moved to London on February 1st 2010. I am happy; more than I could have ever been with anyone. To quote a friend, "Its amazing when the person you love is around you all the time". I have all the love that I could ever ask for from a husband. I am liking this small break in my career too. Taking time to do what I had always loved to do; reading books, stitching, writing and pursuing a new found interest, cooking. But there is still this void which my parents have left. They haven't replied to my emails and texts and not responded to my calls. I am pretty sure they dont spend a day without thinking about me, just the way I do. I miss my home like any girl would and I badly want to hug my parents, argue with them about cricket matches, mess my room and get scolded by my mom, kiss my dog and take her for a walk.

  I have a friend who believes that for something we desire to happen, three things should line up. Personal effort, surrounding circumstances and time. My efforts are on and circumstances are something I cannot control or change. Probably, it isn't time yet. I am sure that someday, my parents would understand what he really means to me. And on that day, these three things would have lined-up and I would be the happiest person. But, it just isn't time yet.

- Veena

Friday, December 19, 2008

Friday, November 28, 2008

My Nation Today...


Volunteering themselves into the mayhem;
Their life at stake, but little did they mind.
Their focus: the safety of a beloved Nation,
Encountering terror upfront; the bravest men of its kind.

Its not just today, a whole family wept,
For the cause of a country to remain unscathed.
They've taken the bullets on their chest,
They are the true men, the true patriots; at their best.

Salutes the Nation, the audacity of its martyrs,
But shuns in shame at the divided dirty politics.
Failing so miserably, in both governing and opposing;
Little do they realize? The power hungry demagogues?

A monument charred and numerous dead,
The terror carved in the hearts of few hundred,
A resolute Nation, irreparably scarred;
The question remains unanswered, for how long so hard?

- Veena
- Dedicated to the Brave NSG Commandos, the Indian National Army, the Mumbai Police and to the numerous civilians who risked their life to save the numerous lives that they did on a day that the Face of India was re-written in the International History of Terror. 26th November 2008..

Monday, November 24, 2008

When the World turns White..


I look and wonder at the muted space;
The barren lands; The stark landscape.
Sheets of ice frozen far and wide,
'My World' here, devoid of the slightest hints of life?
I refuse to swallow this bitter truth;
Reality, most of all is hard to bite.

A cold gust blew across my bare face
Is this the last leaf, to foresake its long fending tree?
I stare, I writhe, struck in the semblance of solitude.
I feel the chill and my heart deep down sinks,
As I lament with tears in agony and emptiness.

The shrill yearning whine! shattering my profound thoughts
Do I hear it wrong? I blink my tears off;
A heartbeat at my feet with adoring eyes,
Wagging its tail, laden with hope;
The faith in its mistress unflinching at all odds.
Personifying faith; I now comprehend is Life's essence.

Lucid in my thoughts, the fog disentangled,
And my days of loneness, in a jify swept away!
The tiny whelp reiterated Life's quintessence;
Fortitude reborn, I face the World afresh.

-Veena